Welcome back to The Bachelor

Welcome back to The Bachelor, the show where love is a journey, everyone is there for the right reasons, and, we assume, Valtrex is handed out like party favors http://www.cheapguccioutlet2012.com. This season, in a desperate attempt to remain relevant in an increasingly crowded field of progressively lowbrow reality programming, The Bachelor has decided to shake things up a bit. They started the show in Ben’s hometown, moved the production to his current residence of San Francisco, and last night introduced us to Ben’s sister, who offered her ideas on who he should bring home to mom. At the rate this show is going this season, everyone will be shacking up in Fantasy Suites by next week.

Here’s how our pilgrims of love progressed this week:

Best Supporting Role by an Inanimate Object: Sometimes a bridge is just a bridge. But if the Bay Bridge shows up on The Bachelor, it means something. When Bachelor Ben invited Epidemiologist Emily on a nice climb up the wires of the Bay Bridge, they both know that if they could manage this feat (harnessed, wearing helmets, and safety measures up the wazoo) they could do anything! It’s not a date so much as a trust fall with a Cal Trans crew in tow. Highlights: When Emily panics because she is walking up a freaking bridge, Ben checks in by asking, “Talk to me, Goose.” If Ben keeps making Top Gun references we may end up liking him.

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Word of the Day: “Leap List.” When Ben invited ten women on a date, he followed the appropriate etiquette and sent an invitation with a mysterious inscription teasing a “leap.” This tantalizing clue lead to Ben’s explanation that skiing down the streets of San Francisco was on his so-called “Leap List.” What we gather is that a Leap List is basically a list filled with nonsensical things that require a lot of municipal permits. Runner up word of the day: “Journey”, which was used at least four times in the first hour. Gucci shoes for men, cheap gucci men shoes outlet 2012 online.

Most blatant product placement: Ben mentions his “Leap List,” and then we get a Honda ad with a “Leap List” theme. Plus all the bachelorettes are driving New Honda CRVs to their date and showing off the unique and exciting features of the car.

Best way to annoy the neighbors: Put a ski slope filled with snow bunnies in the middle of a neighborhood. Somehow The Bachelor crew convinced the city of San Francisco to let them fill a street with snow so that Ben and his gaggle of bachelorettes could inexplicably strip into their skivvies (this is snow-skiing, not water-skiing ladies) and snowplow down the road. Then the whole neighborhood gathered to watch poor Kasey B. ski down the hill backwards with her bikini-clad butt in the air smiling so that Ben would know she was a real sport. It was an eyeful, but probably nothing that San Francisco hadn’t seen before.

Best Sloppy Seconds: After Britney walked out following Ben’s invitation to a one-on-one date, Ben found himself with a free night and invited Linzie (but not her horse) for a date around the city. Stops included an ice cream store, a trolley ride, a dance break at City Hall (where Matt Nathanson sang just for them) and an interlude at a piano store so Ben could serenade his sweetie. Ben thinks Linzi has “something special.” Namely, dimples, boobs, a short skirt, and a sob story about getting dumped after a year and a half via text message.

Most Fateful Words: During the postmortem of her date with Ben, Linzi uttered the worst thing that a reality contestant could possibly say: “There’s nothing that could ruin this night.” Don’t these people know that such a statement is catnip to producers! Sure enough the camera cut to a mystery woman driving a New Honda CRV (naturally), with San Francisco and a date with Ben dialed into the GPS. Gucci women shoes, cheap gucci sneakers boots for women outlet 2012.